My Mistake
by ChimeraTm
Summary: My name is Hermione Granger.I'm a witch,but I'm also a girl…and I fell in love.With the perfect man I might add…that I know nothing about, and that keeps pushing me towards the bane of my existence:Malfoy…Draco.I just don't know what to call him anymore
1. Chapter 1

**Story name: My Mistake**

**Sequel: no**

**Characters: Draco, Hermione**

**Disclaimer(available for the whole story): i do not own anything related to HP.**

**A/N: (i will not repeat this note) for those of u that wish to review this story, i want u to know that i (will) appreciate it, if uu don't have the time and/or don't want to leave a review, then thank u anyway for reading it. on a side note, english is not my first language so please excuse me if (and when) i make mistakes. **

**Chapter 1**

**The reason she needs me**

**~Chimera~**

'Hermione, it'll be all right…' I vaguely hear Ron's voice, but I don't pay him much attention, be that none. How can he say that? Of course it won't. Things will never be alright again._** I**_ will never be alright again. Even in such a moment I can't stop myself from thinking that Ron's mind lacks the ability to form coherent phrases. For I want to believe that he did not just tell me that even though this has just happened, "it'll be alright." How in Merlin's name did I ever think I loved Ron?

Though I am not one to brag about my intellect, I feel no guilt in saying that I deserve someone of the same status. I love Ron for his heart and courage (that to a naked eye is blank), but that is just not enough for me anymore. I need someone I can talk to, someone that would stop complaining of my reading books. It is my passion and shouldn't a loved one share such passion or at least embrace the idea of it?

No, I have tricked my mind into believing I loved Ron and that is far from the truth. But now, who is there to hold me and whisper soothing words? Who shall take care of me? For Merlin only knows I shall need being taken care of. I am sane now, but that is only a matter of hours, more like minutes, until the dread of all that has happened in the last few moments settles in.

Nothing will be alright anymore…

It has been 1 month and 20 days since my world was reduced to nothing. In this time I have eaten, have drunk, have slept by the help of potions and have listened to all the things people kept telling me.

My only protection were my books. I have never found less satisfaction in reading a book than in the last weeks, but alas it represented a way to distract myself.

But now I am going to Hogwarts and though I am terrified of being around so many people, the school has always been my home, and I am confident that I will find some strength to live further once I get there.

I can already feel the smell of parchments and owls and pumpkin, though I am sure that is just a placebo effect. I put my luggage on the rack in the compartment and await for the boys to find their way.

People keep telling me how sorry they are every time they see me. I just can't find it in my soul or mind to understand why they do that.

The boys enter the compartment and I see a frown on Harry's face.

'Malfoy's strange.' He answers before I could ask.

'Why mate?'

'He's not his jolly old self this year. I saw him on my way in and he didn't even throw something nasty at me. He's eyes were glazed over and if possible he's even paler than usual.'

'watch it mate, or I might start to think you pay too much attention to one blond git.'

Ron laughs, and Harry just punches him in the arm. I feel out of place being around them…how so unnatural to feel that around your best friends.

I excuse myself and leave the compartment. Luckily I find an empty one at the back of the train. I do not feel the need for company. I pull out a book from my pocket and bring it back to its normal size by usage of an enlargement spell. I start reading it passively, my mind wandering to unknown places…or rather places I wish remained that way.

'BLOODY MERLIN!' I yell jumping from my seat, tumbling to the ground in my rush.

'I didn't mean to scare you, least of all bring you down to your knees.' The boy says to me…or is it man? He outstretches a hand and I take it.

I straighten up and give him a one over look. Light brown shaggy hair, black eyes, extremely pale, flawless skin, star Quidditch player body, royal posture, shiny perfectly white, perfectly straight teeth. Another perfect good for nothing, probably Slytherin, daddy's little boy…or is it man?

'Hermione Granger' I say to him while still holding his hand.

'please to meet you.' He says with a smile tugging at his lips.

We stay like this for a couple of minutes. I awaiting an answer, he simply staring at me with that smile still threatening to appear.

'and you are?'

'thoroughly wondering why you'd sit here all by yourself.'

'Yes, well, what I mean to say is that you must have a name.'

He lets go of my hand, I suddenly feel colder. He looks at the floor than right back at me, his black eyes twisting my insides. I feel the childish need to run away, hide from those penetrating eyes that gaze into mine as though stripping me of my existence.

'My name…' he trails off huskily 'is of no use to you.'

I glare at him, though his intense stare makes me want to scratch my eyes. 'I assure you that it is.' Lifting my wand to his chest. 'For all I know, you might be a Death Eater.'

'For all you know, I might not.'

'Stop acting like a child and spill out your bloody name.' I yell. I seem to lose my temper a lot lately.

He just continues to stare at me. And then suddenly he grabs my hand, the one with the wand, and puts it down while pulling me towards him and engulfing me in his arms.

I'm shocked at his gesture. I could have easily attacked him before he pushed my hand away. I could still attack him if I wanted to. I felt his arms on my back, his chin resting on the top of my head, his chest pressing into my face, his cologne penetrating my nostrils, and I suddenly let it all out.

I am Hermione Jean Granger, I am the brightest witch of my age, I am the best friend of Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, I have come home from my fifth year of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to find my house blown into nothingness and the bodies of my parents shattered to pieces and now…now I am crying in the arms of a stranger that seems to bring me more comfort that any of my best friends. And as my tears spill on his perfectly white shirt, smudging it with mascara, I realize something…for the first time in 1 month and 3 weeks I realize that I am still alive.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: i forgot to point out that this will be a Draco/Hermione story-my life wouldn't be complete without Draco, so for all of you Draco lovers out there, fear not, he's still the main character.*giggles at the awkward phrasing* **

**Chapter 2**

**Oh, what a childish prat**

**~Chimera~**

We fall into the seat and I nuzzle into his neck. Who is this stranger that seems to know the whole extent of my aching? I wrack my brain to formulate a question…the same question I have already asked twice. But I don't. I know that if I push the issue further he will let go of me, and I can't have that just yet. I need this heat wrapped around me. I need to feel what I feel now.

The books that I most dearly love are filled with advance knowledge, but none of it helps me to understand this. How can I feel protected in the arms of a stranger? I have the feeling that he is indeed a Death Eater, but until he tries to kill me…I don't seem to mind.

What am I saying? This person probably murdered my parents, he probably murdered and tortured a whole lot of other Muggles. Do I really not care?

Maybe I do, and maybe I will turn him in, maybe I will do the right thing in the end, but for now…for now I am going to do something that I have never, not once done in my life done. I am going to be selfish. I am going to take advantage of what this person offers me without giving anything back. I am going to feed my dieing being and only after that will I do what is right and asked of me.

It seems like hours since we sat down, entwined together. I try to find the courage inside of me to face him, but before I even move a muscle the doors slide open and the foul and despicable Malfoy strides in followed by his cronies. He gives the stranger a furrowed glare before he replies with no humor at all.

'Well look here, the Mublood finally found someone that can stand the smell of her filthy blood.'

The stranger stands up and faces Malfoy. I can't seem to stop myself from thinking how less royal Malfoy seems in the presence of this boy…man. Their skin is the same pampered porcelain texture, their posture is equally perfect, but Malfoy seems dominated by the other's height. The knowledge that seeps from the latter's eyes only comes to emphasize the difference between them. Yes, he is a man, and Malfoy nothing but a child.

They look at one another with so much loathing that I shudder. Do they know each other?

'I would be careful with my words if I were you.' The stranger says.

Malfoy continues to stare at him. I can't help noticing the puzzlement in his eyes and actions. He was always one of quick replies. He always gave me a run for my money.

The stranger pulls me off the seat. We walk side by side to my compartment. We say nothing. And then, all of the sudden he disappears.

I stop dead in my tracks, mouth agape, eyes not blinking. It was impossible to apparate on the Hogwarts Express.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**What I do to you**

**~Chimera~**

'Yes', 'No', 'um…yes', 'ok', 'of course'. These are the words I struggle with everyday. No more raising my hand in mid air, no more whacking Ronald on the back of his head when he says something stupid, no more telling Mr. Binns that the Goblin war was in 1672 and not 1726.

Where is the old Hermione Granger? Where is know-it-all insufferable Granger, or bookworm Granger?

Honestly? I do not know, but I do know where she would most likely be. In the arms of that stranger.

I have spent nights and days in the arms of either Ron or Harry in the common room, waiting to fall asleep, find peace, or at least cry out some of my pain. But to no avail. I still wonder how it is possible that I revealed all of my feelings to that stranger, but I cannot, under no circumstances, do this in front of my friends. I have even tried talking to Ginny about it, but no…that didn't work either.

Maybe it's because they were related to me before this…incident took place in my life. Or maybe it's because he never said anything to me about it. Or maybe he was just the perfect person in the perfect place at the perfect time… then again, maybe not.

I look up from my half eaten plate. Harry and Ron are talking about Quidditch, Ginny is having a quarrel with Lavender about some new makeup spell, Neville is eating his lunch while glancing towards Luna at the Ravenclaw table, and while I stretch my eyes further, I can see Pansy Parkinson clinging to Malfoy as though he was the last man on Earth. Yes, life does go on…or at least other's life. The same story every year, though Harry was right, Malfoy is a bit strange this year. But since when do I care… all I care about right now is my newly found drug. I never thought I could get so tangled up in something in such short a time. I've only spent minutes with him, doing and speaking absolutely nothing, and here I am, an addict. Maybe our future is really set for us from the start, maybe I was meant to fall for him. But I don't believe such rubbish. If I hadn't looked for a free compartment I would have never encountered him, if I hadn't of been so vulnerable I would have never given him the chance to be there for me, I would have hexed his ass as quickly as you would say "hex". No, nothing is settled from the start. I just happen to cling to something. Yes, that must be it. I needed a change, and he came. I hate how everyone does the same thing every year, says the same thing only in a different phrasing, plays the same games, has the same goals and complaints. This year is nothing like my last, my life is nothing like the previous, but everything around me seems to be the same…everything beside him.

Potions, Charms, Transfiguration, Potions… everything passes by me. What do I care what McGonagall has to say about turning my quill into a tea cup, what do I care if Snape takes another 10 points from our house because Ronald tripped over Malfoy's foot?

I don't. Never will. Certainly have in the past. Why do we even come to this school? All this knowledge can be found in books. I can even give them a list if they find the task too appalling. This is just a waste of my time. But then again what would I do with my time anyway? I feel lost. I've never felt this way. I was always ready and I always had a backup plan, just in case. Nothing could catch me unprepared. Until now. Is it not strange to find love a task? It's like a new, different school lecture that I find myself unprepared for. The feelings I have now didn't come with a manual.

I sit myself at dinner and my plate fills up with delicious food that I find hard to swallow. Why eat? Food doesn't taste anymore. It looks good, but I feel like I'm eating straws and I'm sure there is nothing wrong with it, because at my left, Ronald is stuffing his face with it. But then again, Ronald would even eat straws. Malfoy on the other hand seems to share my opinion. He's not touching his food, only glaring at it. Pansy misses her mouth while glancing at him. It's funny, she's a complete imbecile, but somehow I don't feel like laughing, in other circumstances I might even feel a bit of pity towards the obnoxious girl. That has to be the day when they finally declare me mentally incompetent.

'Excuse me.' I say and go out of the room.

I keep doing this. Wandering the school corridors and even the grounds at night. Somehow, in the back of my mind and heart I think I'm hopping he'll come to me again if I were alone. But he never does.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**My request**

**~Chimera~**

I can't even try to explain how right this feels. It's like someone trapped me in a crystal ball fully equipped with my own personal library. I don't care what's beyond these walls. I don't care what people say or think. I want to keep this moment, seal it and guard it.

I want to say something. Anything. But I can't. I know I'll make him go away again. But I don't need to say anything, he seems to read my mind.

'I can't stay. You know that, don't you?'

I feel myself nodding. Do i? no, of course I don't. why? It makes no sense whatsoever. It feels right, it should be right, but somehow it's not. I deserve him, I know I do. I might not be the best looking witch out there…I might actually be far from that, and though he is a god I know he is mine and only mine as I am his. This is what I've been living for. for him. Somehow, deep down inside I knew I would find him. Somehow I knew that my days spent studying and figuring out riddles to help harry would pay off. I knew that some day he would come. I admit I never expected it to be so soon. No, I more or less imagined meeting him a few moments before I'd die, but even so it would be worth it. I'm not a fool. I know the darkness is approaching. And in the end Harry is just a boy. He might have love by his side, but knowledge is stronger when it comes down to wands. And we all know Voldamort has a lot of that. Sometimes I think he's a lot powerful than Dumbledore, but my heart and pride and Gryffindor courage tell me to stick with our Headmaster. On the other hand, like I said, I am no fool. I know that I will most likely die, and I won't lie and say I'm not afraid of dieing. That would be plain stupidity, or as Malfoy would say, stupid Gryffindor courage. He is right, just this once, it is stupid not to fear death. But this man's presence makes future seem more bearable. So how can I not fight his words? but even so, even if I am crying and cringing inside, I say nothing. Maybe somehow, if I say nothing, time will stop in this blissful moment.

'I'll never harm you.'

You're leaving… how can you say you won't hurt me when you plan on disappearing again?

'I will come back.' He whispers into my neck. I shudder and feel a tear making its way down my cheek. I didn't know I was under so much pressure.

'but you have to promise to trust me.'

I close my eyes and breathe, taking in his smell, deep, masculine. I focus on his arms wrapped around me, his white shirt clinging to my back as he keeps me pressed to his chest, his pale hands resting on my abdomen as my head rests at the bottom of his neck.

'do you promise?'

I nod once again. but he doesn't go on. Though I don't expect an answer, somehow I know he needs me to say it.

'Yes…' I breathe out. But he's still waiting 'Yes, I'll trust you.' The words come out in a harsh tone, my throat seems to be constricted.

'good.'

And that's the last thing. For an hour or so we just sit there. And then I feel him kiss my forehead and before I could turn around he's gone. Another tear rolls down my cheek. So unexpected, yet welcomed, so short yet desired.

I stand up. I took my dose, now life goes on.

'Mr. malfoy! I will have you know that this class is not optional. i advise you to take advantage of your night to dose off, not my lecture!'

i divert my eyes to malfoy. without the sneer or his face he actually looks nice. his hair seems to have taken styling lessons from Harry's, a lot better than his usually sleeked back locks. but what strikes me the most are his eyes. the dark circles underneath them makes the storm in them seem even more ruthless. he looks innocent. the irony of it all.

'yes, professor.' his husky voice says. i noticed this about him. he never says "sorry". don't ask me why i did that, i just discovered that i expected that from him. and somehow it suits him-his personality.

'Hermione!'

i turn my face to ron, and i realize he's been calling my name for some time now, judging by the scowl on his face. 'can you please help me with this before mcgonagall bites my head off.' i roll my eyes. same ron, always looking for the easy way out. i'm actually sick and tired of helping him, and even harry from time to time, with school related problems. but i can't find it inside of me to say "no".

'dismissed' mcgonagall says and we all rush out the door. i don't understand why everyone says i grovel at mcgonagall's feet. i mean i can't help but admire her. she's the best teacher in school and she always knows how to deal with difficult situations, she's calm and calculated. and that's not even half of it. did you know that she was the first witch permitted to enter the wizengamot? it seems like nothing now that most of it is made out of women, but that wasn't the deal when she was young. it's strange to even imagine that the wizardry world was so narrow minded. but they were, and back then the world was not only ruled by purebloods, but by men purebloods nonetheless. it's ridiculous if you think about it now, but not then, and maybe not in the future if the war keep on this path.

a hand grabs my arm and pulls me into a secluded corridor, but unlike most people i don't cry out or try to fight the person...i smile.

'you shouldn't smile' he says furrowing his eyebrows. 'you should fight back.'

'why would i do that when i know that you're at the end of that hand.'

he laughs a sad laugh, almost an angered one. he leans down, near my face, and whispers gently.

'don't let you guard down when with me. you should be afraid of me.'

'didn't you tell me to trust you?'

He smiles a crooked smile and engulfs me in his arms, taking in a deep breath. 'I did, didn't I?'

'where do you go?' I need answers. I held my thoughts back because I was afraid I would scare him, but I hope we're now beyond that moment. I can't keep seeing him without getting some answers first.

He shakes his head and lowers himself on the window ledge.

'what is your name.' again the shake. I bite my lip and feel my throat constricting at the thought of the answer 'are you a death eater?'

He doesn't shake his head this time. He looks at me with heavy eyelids. Oh god! All questions disappear from my head the moment he looks at my lips. There's nothing I would like more than to touch his, but I'm afraid, me, Hermione granger, the wits behind voldamorts destruction, me, the gyffindor princess (stupid nick name) is afraid of kissing this exquisite example of a man. He leans forward and I feel my breath hitch in my throat. No no no no no no no no! I move my face slightly and he gets the idea.

'sorry… I just…'

I blush from head to toe. How can a girl explain to a definitely more than less sex god that she's just a scared little kitten instead of a lion and that like the perfectionist she is, she needs time to stage the show, think about the out come, compare plausible results and measure pro and cons. Well that'll really be a turn on. So I decide to go for a more mature explanation.

'I need answers…'

He looks at me again. Why does he speak so little and so shushed?

'you're not going to give me any, are you?'

He bits his lip-pause for brain to start functioning again-and then he whispers 'no, I'm not.'

I sigh.

'but I do want to ask something of you.'

'that's hardly fair. You give me no clues and then expect me to help you?'

'it's not me you're going to help.'

I open my mouth to say something, but the moment he puts his index finger on my lips I don't give a rats ass about what I was going to say.

'I need you to tutor Draco Malfoy at transfiguration.'

Pause…you, tutor, malfoy, trans…hm…seems I got that right…wait, WHAT?

'what?'

His finger slides as he moves his thumb on my lips, his hand stroking my cheek. He draws the outline of my lips…suddenly malofy-me-trans doesn't sound that awful anymore.

'yes.'

As he lets go of me I feel my brain being resuscitated. Again…clear…again…clear….bip-bip-bip. All right people, we have a pulse.

'why?'

'I have my reasons.'

Before I could ask anything else: 'close your eyes.'

I listen and reluctantly close them. My hands start to shake a little. And then I feel…his lips on the corner of my mouth.

After a few seconds I open my eyes. He's gone.

**A/N: i want to apologize for the text format (as you can see it lacks capital letters) i have a problem with my computer...or better yet, the absence of said computer. i write on some type of notebook that makes it really difficult for me to press that darn shift button. sorry **


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

**I insist**

**~Chimera~**

No, I refuse to do such a thing. Ruin my social life and send a dozen of my neurons to the front line of the battle field.

I cross my arms over my chest and glare at Malfoy. He doesn't see me of course, he's sleeping again, but given that this is Mr. Binns' class that's understandable.

Why would he ask such a thing of me, but more importantly: why does he care? I knew it. He and Malfoy have something going on. I mean, I am partly sure he is a death eater, but he didn't seem quite the mate when he and Malfoy glared at each other on the train. Oh, male species are so complicated! And I'm supposed to be the expert in this field seeing as I know everything about Harry and Ron…or at least I did, before this year that is.

I hit my head against the desk. Life is horrible.

'Mrs. Granger! Is there something wrong?'

Perfect! Leave it to Binns to make me crawl under my desk in shame. He's got impeccable timing. The only time I'm not paying attention to his class, he chooses the moment to pay attention to us. Have I been cursed over the summer or something?

'No professor, everything is fine.' Yeah right.

Several hours later I'm sitting at the Gryffindor table, trying not to throw up seeing Ron stuffing his face with food. Out of boredom or maybe curiosity, I find myself looking once more at Malfoy. He's not sleeping this time, but neither is he eating his dinner. Pansy's clinging to his side again. God, that has to be so annoying. Suddenly I froze when he looks at me. God, that boy has such a distorted face when he sneers like that.

I yell, jumping out of my seat, sending my plate full of rice on Ron's face.

''Mione!' yeah yeah. What ever. I look at the brown barn owl next to me.

'what do you want.' SHI#! It just bit my hand. Stupid, stupid bird. It flies away, leaving a piece of parchment behind.

I roll my finger in a tissue and look at the piece of paper. It isn't signed, and the writing is in capital letters. 'I know you're not doing what I told you. I'm not coming back until you listen to me.' The letters banish once I've read them. Yes, definitely a death eater, and an experienced one too.

Uh…decisions, decisions. Back in my room I take out a piece of paper and jot down the ideas that swirl in my head.

"80% sure he's a death eater.

He's the only one I feel alive around.

He's the most beautiful man I have ever met.

He's not going to hurt me.

I could, maybe, gather information from him once he trusts me.

Everyone deserves a chance.

I could make him become a spy if he falls in love with me.

I am bloody curios!"

Nothing seems to make a valid point, so I leave it to the heart to decide, and we all know what it wants.

I could hear his voice from the other room. Even though I was expecting this kind of reaction from him, and even though Malfoy is a bastard and I would never give a damn about his opinion of me, I still can't stop myself from shuddering slightly.

'there has to be someone else. There just has to be!'

'I'm sorry Mr. Malfoy, but Miss Granger seems to be the only one available.'

'what about that gay guy, Ernie McMillan or something like that.'

'Mr. Mafloy!'

'professor, I'm s-sorry. I promise I will learn on my own. You know I can, in my past years...'

'I'm sorry Mr. Malfoy, but for whatever reason, you seem slightly unfocused this year. I have given you a week to **get** focused, but I have seen no change in your behavior. You will meet Miss Granger every Thursday night in the library, at precisely 8 o'clock, and will cooperate with her for 1 hour and a half.'

I can almost hear his anger boiling.

'you can come out now Miss Granger.' I do so, thank her, and retreat towards the door. 'may I ask why?' I turn and look at her desk, I can't look her in the eye.

'I'm not sure... but I have to.'

As I make my way down the hall, to my dorm, I suddenly froze hearing his voice.

'Why do it, Granger?' I turn to face him, but before I could answer, he continues 'why ask McGonagall to tutor me.'

'Me? I didn't ask her...she asked me.'

'Ah, but here you are mistaken, Granger. Do you know why?'

I look at him, knowing that was a rhetoric question.

'You assume I am one of your stupid little friends, when in fact, I do have a brain.'

'Firstly, my friends are not stupid, and secondly, if you were that smart, would you need tutoring? I don't think so.'

I suddenly find myself between the stone wall, and Malfoy's body.

'Listen, Mudblood. You are dirt! You don't level up to me, you are beneath me in every aspect.'

Though I am shaking, I find power inside of me to push him back, but he doesn't budge, thus I resort to my best attribute: my ability to use logic and voice my opinion.

'Then how do you explain the fact that I am better than you in each and every class?'

I see the anger floating in his grey eyes, and shudder, he pulls my hair sharply and my head hits the wall behind me. I whimper and close my eyes in pain. Before I can open them again, I find myself released.

'Don't' punch 'ever' punch 'hurt' punch 'her' punch 'again'.

He's here, watching over me. Malfoy's beneath him, pinned to the ground, his face a mesh of blood and ripped skin, his blond-white hair stained with very dark red blood. Droplets of the same blood dripping from **his** hand, fist clenched in anger, body shivering in disgust and adrenaline. I feel my insides turning,

'Stop' I whisper 'stop' again...the third time I find my voice 'Stop'. He gets up, blood still dripping from his fist. He looks down at Malfoy and I think he's going to hit him with his foot, like in all the highschool muggle movies, but we're not in the muggle world now, are we? He pulls out his wand and yells 'sectumsepra'. My eyes widen, I do not know the spell. He runs a hand through his hair and leaves. I look at Malfoy, his white shirt is ripped, 5 long, deep cuts cover his chest, the same blood gushing out of them.

'Wait! Tell me what to do!'

He turns, looks at me and then turns again. 'Save him if you think he deserves it. Think of what he did to you, then think of what he could do, and then, if you find his life still worth while...call Severus...Snape.'


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

**You're such a stubborn little witch**

**~Chimera~**

'I'll ask you one more time, Miss Granger, who did it?'

I look at my DADA teacher and then back at my feet. Even if I want to, I can't answer, for I do not know his name.

'I don't know. I found Malfoy on the ground.'

'Then who told you to come to me?'

'No one did.' I lie once again 'you're the defense against the dark arts teacher! I found it natural to come to you, plus, he is your student, and you are his godfather.'

'Why not take him to the hospital wing?'

'I don't know!' I almost yell jumping from my seat. We look at each other for long minutes until he finally looks away.

'You know, Miss Granger, there are always other ways to persuade you.' I follow his eyes and land mine on a bottle of Veritaserum.

There was a time in which I would have feared Snape. But not now. I look back at him with my eyes set. I am no longer a first grader and he should finally realize that... I am no longer a child, not by choice, mind you.

'Very well, Miss Granger, you may leave now.'

I do so, making my way to my dorm. I am exhausted, I am dirty (with Malfoy's blood of all things), cranky and starving. And since I have skipped dinner to come to the aid of the bane of my existence, I will now have to wait till morning to eat, which leads to all the other stuff…well, except dirty I think, though Merlin only knows I am so tired I can't find it inside of me to take a shower, but given that, as I have already mentioned, this is Malfoy's blood, I somehow manage to make it to the shower and ponder setting my clothes on fire. Finally I decide to leave it to the house elves to see if they can get rid of the germs or not, and dress in my pajamas.

The next day, at breakfast I don't see Malfoy. He's probably still recovering. I can't seem to stop my tummy from crunching at the thought of Malfoy telling Snape that I had been lying the previous day. I guess I'll just have to wait until either Malfoy confronts me, or Snape attempts to kill me.

Averting my mind from such optimistic thoughts, I now find myself musing over his behavior. Granted, I needed help, and it's not like I give a damn if anyone draws a little blood from Malfoy's pampered skin, but what he did was beyond my expectations and my wishes. Somehow I know that something more than my dignity stood at the core of the fight. He hadn't just been protecting me, he had been vengeful. Those two have a history, and I'll be damned if I let them get away with it without figuring it out.

'Mione?'

I turn to Ron and glare at him 'What?'

'well…I was just…I mean. What I'm trying to say is that…'

'Oh, for Merlin's sake, Ron, just spill it out!'

'I was just wondering if you were alright. You've been cutting your tissue for some time now, and while I know you were on a diet, I just can't imagine you eating tissue.'

I look down in my plate and see that indeed I'm not cutting what I thought was lettuce. At least that explains why it was so difficult to cut.

'Yeah, Ron, I'm oky…just thinking about Potions.'

'Ooh!' he says and nods, as though Potions is the answer for everything bad in this world. Now that I think about it, maybe he's not exactly wrong. I mean, potions means Snape, which leads to either Malfoy, or Dark Mark, or slime. Which all lead to other dark and greasy things. It seems I have to agree with Ron on something. Just this once, mind you.

'Hey, you two.' Harry whispers. 'I have to tell you something. Tonight, in the common room, at midnight.'

I look at him. With all that has happened, I haven't looked at Harry in a long time. He has dark circles under his eyes, his hair is messier than usual, his skin paler. I suddenly realize what a bad friend I have been. Granted I have my own problems to think about, but if I know something, is that whatever happens in my life, I can never turn my back on my friends. Ron, Harry and I have faced a lot of things together, and while Ron is just getting on my nerves lately, Harry isn't talking to me like he used to and I have a man and a half dead Malfoy (consequently a frightening Snape) on my mind, we still are like brothers and sister and I still love them to death.

'Sure, Harry' I tell him putting my hand over his 'do you need any help with the Transfiguration essay?'

'HEY!' Ron says lifting his head from his plate, gracing me with the wonderful sight of the half chewed food 'how come you never say stuff like that to me?'

And so, with all our separate problems, with the war standing on our doorstep, NEWTS approaching, we start laughing.

I guess you can always count on friends.

It's already Thursday night.

I've been biting my nails all day long, praying to Merlin that Malfoy will suddenly decide not to come. I've seen him in class; he doesn't even have a scratch. Snape hasn't killed me yet, so I'm betting my money Malfoy kept quiet. My question is why?

As I'm making my way to the library, silently, as I have said, praying Malfoy decides to skip our nightly encounters, I can't stop thinking about Harry. Dumbledore was really going overboard with this. And though Harry disagrees, I think there's more to his plan than just informing Harry. I think Dumbledore is preparing him for something, and I want to know what that something is. I hate it how our Headmaster always knows everything from the start. At first, I thought he was just a good judge of character, then, when I learned that wizards where capable of reading peoples minds, I thought that was how Dumbledore got all his information, and I felt the need to gag; what he did, or at least, what I thought he did, was beyond revolting. It's bordering on the Dark Arts to read someone's mind without their permission, and I expected more from the brightest wizard of all time, to say the least. But then things just didn't add up. I put the two things together, but still, some facts remained unanswered. I'm beginning to think the sneaky old man has a time turner and uses it to spy on people… then again I hope I'm wrong, for everyone knows that messing with time has serious repercussions. To sum up my discussion with Harry, Dumbledore keeps showing him bits and pieces of Voldamort's past, trying to make Harry understand why Tom Riddle is the way that he is. He even asked Harry to obtain a memory from our Potions Professor, one that presumably holds great information. I can't say I'm not interested.

Finally I get to the main corridor that leads to the library. One thing people outside of Hogwarts don't know, is that it's bloody difficult to get anywhere in this school. The staircases change almost every 10 minutes or so, making you take numerous detours and maybe even lose yourself in this endless building.

'I see you saved him.' he says 'I knew you would. Sometime you're just too kind for your own good.' I turn around and look at him. My first reaction is to fling my arms around his neck and kiss him, but then…this is almost, hopefully just almost, a criminal. I look at him. He seems tired.

'you went too far, you know that.' I find myself saying.

He looks at me with sad eyes and then I find myself pulled into his embrace. 'I'm sorry I dragged you into this. But you must understand. I had every right.'

Though I love the smell and feel of him, the second I hear those words I struggle to get out of his embrace. 'No one has a right to do such a thing. Malfoy may be evil and disgusting, but no one deserves to be beaten to a bloody pulp. You didn't even give him time to retaliate; it was hardly a fair fight. You purebloods pride yourselves on being all powerful and hating Muggles, but when it comes down to rage you set things the muggle way, like brutes.' I stop, taking deep breaths, trying to calm myself down.

'I never told you I was pureblood.' Is the only thing he says.

'Well are you?' I ask rising my hands in mid air, tired of all this nonsense.

He looks at me and I can practically see him thinking whether to tell me or not. Finally he seems to make up his mind. 'Yes, yes I am.'

Well at least I know one thing about him. 'Now will you tell me your name?'

'No.'

'Why not?' I half yell.

'Hermione! We both know there are books filled with everything, and we both know you would never give up on something. If I do so much as tell you my middle name then by the end of next week you'll even find out what I eat for breakfast.'

I can't stop myself from smiling, but only to some degree. 'How do you know that?'

'I've watched you…a lot.' He says in a quiet voice, his eyes softening.

I sigh. How come he gets to me like this? He makes me turn into a puddle at his feet. I hate it! It's so annoying, I can't get anywhere if I'm all girly and giggling.

'I need to ask you something.'

I roll my eyes 'of course you do. Because it is only fair that you ask things of me and give me nothing in return.' I look at him, with hope in my eyes, but he doesn't seem to budge. 'shoot!'

He smiles 'Muggle phrasing.' But then turns serious 'I need you to take a book from Malfoy. Make sure he doesn't see you. It's a brown, leather book with gold inscriptions. He keeps it in his schoolbag.'

I eye him suspiciously. 'Why?'

He shakes his head. Uh! I never want to see another human being shake its head again!

'FINE! But listen to me and listen good.' I say poking him in the chest – and what a fine chest that is- ' this is the last time I do something for you without getting something in return, and I'm not talking about presents, I'm talking about information, so next time you want to ask something of me, be sure to have something to bargain with.'

He smiles a wide, bright smile and pulls me in his arms, giving me a peck on the lips. It was the chastest thing ever…still, I have no words to express the joy and happiness and…maybe something a lot more on the lustful side, that engulfed me.

I make my way to the library smiling. I know that behind my back he'll disappear, I don't know how he does it, but at this exact moment I don't even care.

'What are you smiling at, Mudblood? That happy to see me?'

And of course Malfoy has to go and ruin it. But as I look at him, I can't find it inside me to want to hit him in the face, like in 3rd year. He looks so tired and worn out. I almost feel pity for him. I actually have to stop my hand from caressing his head. I blame it all on my hormonal stage, being a girl is some times too difficult.

'No Malfoy, although this might come as a shock to you, the world does not revolve around your pampered ass.'

He rubs his eyes and looks at me straight in the eyes, all features serious 'You're right, Granger…it does come as a shock to me.'

I inwardly laugh, but don't give him the pleasure of showing weakness.

'Now, lets get down to business, shall we?' I say.

He takes out his Trans book and while I sit myself at the table, I see another book, one that he had been keeping his head on mere moments before. Various notes come out of it, a quill squashed between it's pages, ink sprawled on Malfoy's hands. So that's the book he wants me to get, and as it seems, Malfoy's really fond of it.

'Now, I thought we should start with the basics, just to have everything clear, then we'll make a plan of the chapters we've learned and outline the ones that we have for the upcoming test, I think it's best we focus on those seeing as we don't have enough time to go through everything.'

'Well, Granger, to use you're phrasing, it might come as a shock to you, but I'm not really stupid.'

'Well, Malfoy, as you've previously so well said: yes, it does come as a shock to me.'

We glare at each other. Only one thing on my mind… "Merlin, it's going to be a long night."

**A/N: I'm sorry my chapters aren't very long, it's just that while i like coming up with ideas for stories and i often not find it difficult to read fanfiction, i don't have that much experience with writing...anything. i don't exactly need imagination and big words in my field of work (i.e. collage). However, i hope to gain experience... and then hopefully my chapters will get longer. Practice makes perfect, right? **


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

**I'm just frustrating, aren't I?**

**~Chimera~**

Merlin I can't believe I am saying this, but I have to admit, Malfoy is not as dumb as I previously thought he was. In fact, as I pear from underneath my hair as he circles the 25th answer on my test, I have to say that not only is he not stupid, but he is in fact bloody brilliant.

He finishes his test and hands it to me. I take it and put it over the pile of books at my left.

'Why?' I ask.

He looks at me, sighs and looks back at the test.

'Aren't you going to look it over?' he says rubbing at his eyes again.

'No, it's fine. I checked it while you were answering.'

'And did I live up to your expectations?'

His voice is husky. He's clearly beat. I don't understand it, what could take up so much of his time? From what I've heard, his playboy escapades are not that frequent lately, so on the contrary, he should get more rest. Maybe abstinence is the answer, but why would he, when Pansy flings herself at him every time?

'I don't understand, Malfoy. You have a gift, you...'

'Yeah, Granger, I have a gift, but you know nothing about that particular gift.' he smirks.

'I was talking about your learning abilities. Us mere mortals have to spend twice the amount of time learning something, you just have to read the stupid notes once, and you remember everything.'

'Granger, I hardly think you qualify as a mere mortal.'

'Oh, I don't, do I? Then what am I Malfoy, dirt, scum, a rug you can wipe your precious pureblood feet on?'

'Well, yes, granger, you are all of that' he mumbles sleepily 'but at that particular moment, I was trying to give you a compliment. You have top marks in every class, Granger.'

My lips form a small "o" just as the grandfather clock chimes 10.

'That's my cue to leave, Mudblood, it's not my fault you were late.'

As he bends down to take his bag off of the floor, I put a bunch of my notes over the book, hoping he will not notice.

'Same time next week?' I say trying to distract his attention from gathering his things.

'Yeah, whatever, Granger.' he shrugs his shoulders, flipping the strap of his book bag over his neck.

I watch him walk out of the library, my heart thumping. I could feel beads of sweat gathering on my forehead. As soon as the door closes, I throw everything in my bag and hurry out of the library and into my dorm. I make my way up the stairs, ignoring everyone around me. I don't know if it's because of the fact that I did something outside of my comfort zone, but it sure feels good.

I discard my Mary Janes at the leg of my bed and dig for the book inside my bag. My hands have been itching to touch it since the first time I saw it.

'Let's see what dark, hidden secrets you have, Mr. Malfoy.'

I'll have you know that I did ponder for a couple of seconds whether I've gone completely mad, but I decided to put it aside for the moment.

My attention being brought back to the book, I open it, hopping to find something incriminating, like Malfoy's diary for instance. But, to my utter amazement, it s not. On the first page, in green sparkling letters it says 'wizard's guide to mending anything.' I scrunch up my nose in distaste an flip to the page his quill marked. On the left corner of the page, written with the same green letters it says 'Chapter 5. Mending furniture'. Well, that explains a lot.

As I make my way to breakfast the next day, I see him standing by the girl's bathroom on the third floor. I look around me, and thank Merlin for keeping the boys up till morning. I make my way to the bathroom and shove the book in his hand.

'This is bull.'

'Yes, I am quite sure.' he replies smiling. 'Necessary bull though.'

'Why would you need me to steal that crap? It makes absolutely no sense.'

'Such language, coming from a prefect!' he says smiling boyishly and my legs turn to jelly. His ability to undo me never ceases to amaze me.

'Why do you need this?' I ask trying not to think of his luscious lips.

Another smile 'Now why would I tell you that?' seeing my eyes flash dangerously, he adds quickly in a more serious, yet caring voice 'You trust me. I know you do. And you should. Just…trust your instincts.'

'And how do I know you're not messing with my instincts?' I mumble, not sure if he was meant to hear it or not, but he does, so I lift my eyes and look into his deep black ones. 'How do I know you're not using any spell?' My voice quivers slightly. I'm really close to breaking down again.

He takes a step near me and looks down at my face, taking my left cheek in the palm of his hand. I exhale sharply and for a moment forget to inhale. My oxygen deprived brain manages to process his words: 'Because I'm not.'

And it's that simple. Four words, totally lacking knowledge, and it's enough for me.

'I have to go to breakfast.' I say.

'Hermione. Just…keep an eye on Malfoy.' I hear him 'But don't tell Potter.'

I spin and look at him intensely. 'What do you mean?' I almost spat.

He sighs 'I just don't think you…we should jump to conclusions just yet. I'm just being cautious.'

I measure him with a thoughtful look and nod. 'Oky.' I turn around again, but stop, with my hand on the door handle. 'When will I see you again?' I ask.

There's a pause, but then he says, as if he checked an appointment in his mind. 'Two weeks from now. On the second floor bathroom.'


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**~Chimera~**

**You seem to get along **

Two weeks. Two whole weeks. Can you see the joy on my face? Hm...no? Then how about my sarcastic tone of voice? I keep wondering what he's up to.

Keep an eye on Malfoy, he says. How about I keep an eye on him instead of out for him. Way to go, Hermione, I'm surprised you don't have a crush on Voldemort as well.

And how am I supposed to keep an eye on Malfoy? All he does in class is sleep, sleep and pretend not to sleep. I can't very well follow him to his dorm, now can I?

Stupid, stupid Hermione. Why didn't I think of this before? The Marauder's map. _'But don't tell Potter'_. Hm… maybe he won't ask.

'Is there anything wrong?'

'No, no, of course not, you know I'd tell you if there was' ha! Won't ask my arse.

'Then why do you need the map?'

'I just want to go to the restricted section, to look at some books, maybe find something that could help us with, you know…those objects' I whisper the last word. Note to self, do some research on the matter, you can't very well be slacking just because you fell in love… shit, fell in love? Way to make matters worse.

'ok, ok. Just be careful, I don't want you getting caught by anyone.'

I roll my eyes, like I could be that stupid.

After another several minutes of persuasion, I finally have the map in my hands, and as I unfold it and whisper the password, ink begins to spread on it, but, after checking it twice, I find something really off, namely, there is no dot with the Malfoy name on it. I stare at it for half an hour, but nothing. I finally give up and go to sleep.

it's been three days now since I started looking for Malfoy on the map, but nothing, whenever I get into my room and draw the curtains around my bed, I open up the map, just to find absolutely everyone there except Malfoy.

On the fifth day, an idea occurs to me. What if instead of looking for Malfoy, I try looking for his sidekicks, Crabbe and Goyle? And wouldn't you know it, where are they to be if not on the seventh floor corridor. And guess what else is on the seventh floor corridor. Yup, the room of requirement, the single room that doesn't appear on the map.

Just to confirm my hunches, I decide to skip dinner the next day, and wait in my bed, with the map, for Malfoy to get up and go his merry way.

And, of course his dot disappeared just as he got to the seventh floor. Perfect, now I just have to find out what he's up to.

For a moment I wonder if I should ignore _his_ advice, or threat, and tell Harry about all of this, but some part of me thinks I should listen to him, he did save me from Malfoy, and he did stay by my side when I needed him to. I don't think he wishes me harm.

On the seventh day, I have to meet Malfoy, for our tutoring sessions again. One hour passes smoothly, with him, reviewing our last lesson and asking me questions, and me checking his homework. There is much to say about someone from reading his work, like, take Malfoy for instance, this clearly isn't his best, because he still doesn't get enough sleep, but even though he sometimes misspells some words, due to tiredness, you can see that his vocabulary is really vast, his speech is precise and catchy, a perfect example of a smart man's work.

After finishing it, I look at Malfoy, again doing a quick test that I made up for him. He keeps rubbing his eyes with his right hand, as his left circles the answers. Eventually, he puts his quill down, and looks at me pointedly, with his dark bags standing out on his pale porcelain skin. He looks left and right to check that no one's there and then back at me. 'If you ever tell anyone, I promise you'll have hell to suffer'

I open my mouth to retort, a perfect reply on the tip of my tongue, when he bends over and pulls a pair of glasses out of his book bag and slips them on.

For a couple of seconds I remain like that, with my mouth forming a ridiculous "o" as the image of Maloy wearing glasses settles in my mind.

'You wear glasses?' I dumbly state the obvious.

'Now what gave you that impression, Granger?' he asks me incredulously.

I fidget in my seat; well it really was a stupid question to ask, no use arguing about that.

He starts reading the test again, so I start watching him again, since I have nothing else to do till he finishes.

He really is beautiful, like all the girls say he is. His hair falls down only scraping the tips of his lashes, his cheekbones are well defined, his eye the most beautiful color (I remember an ophthalmologist telling me that grey eyes were really unique), his skin, as I previously noticed is very pale, porcelain texture. I can't see his body, only his chest and hands, but it's enough to make any girls blood pressure rise.

I really like hands in general. I think they are one of the most erotic parts of a man. The ways a pair of hands can touch you, the things it can do to you…

'Do they really call you the Slitherin Sex God?' What? Where did that come from? I turn around, looking behind me. No, no one there, actually, no one around us within hearing of seeing range. Well that's just awkward, since my mouth is the only one that could release that traitorous thought.

I feel myself shrinking in my seat, like Alice in Wonderland, only not because of a potion, but because of shame.

He slowly lifts his eyes to mine, a lopsided smile on his lips, as though he himself can't believe the question. Well, who's to blame him?

Hm… note to self, lopsided smiles look good on Malfoys wearing glasses.

He links his fingers in front of him and leans back, making himself comfortable.

' Are you asking me if they call me, or are you truly asking if I am the Slitherin Sex God?'

' Oh, it was just a silly question, nothing to analyze here, Malfoy. You know, just checking if people have their facts straight.' Dumb arse answer.

'Well, what can I say, I have to congratulate those people on doing thorough research.'

Arrogant bastard.

'I just don't get it. You're 16…' I say mimicking my confusion with my hands.

He looks at me as though I have a squid sprouting from my ears 'Your point being?'

'Ok, let me put it this way, the girls you sleep with are 16 years old.'

'Granger, I really do not like to repeat myself, but I see that it is necessary. So, listen carefully this time around…**Your point being?**'

'My point being, Malfoy' I scoff 'that their body is not yet developed, you can't expect me to understand why you'd like to have sex with girls that have tits the size of apples, and flat arses, not to mention that the ones you go for have knives instead of knees and elbows due to their eating disorders.' I let out a deep breath once I'm finished and turn my eyes to look at him just as he bursts out laughing.

'I never expected such an honest reply from you, Granger.' He chuckles 'I guess, the honest and simplest answer is that's it's better than doing it yourself, plus, some of them are attractive.'

'So a guy can't go what, a week without either masturbating or shagging?'

'Granger, you're a smart girl, you know there are different variables involved in that equation. Take for instance me. Bragging aside, I have girls coming at me from every direction, it'd be stupid not to take advantage of that fact. Now take for instance Weasel, I really don't want to think about him doing his stuff, but I gather it's not as often, since he's probably still a virgin.'

'He's not' I slip again. Dam it! What's with the verbal diarrhea?

'Really, now there's an interesting fact? How so…?'

'He cheated on me, with Lavender Brown. Can't say I didn't expect that.'

'So what, he cheated on you because you wouldn't have sex with him?'

'I didn't say that!'

'Your previous inquiry as to why I, person of the opposite sex, find shagging to be important at this age, tells me that you were wondering why he felt the need to cheat, which tells me that either you are a really bad shagg, or that you haven't had sex, and since I already had sex with Brown and I can tell you can't be worse than that, I'll go with option number two.'

Well who dragged the witty Malfoy out of his hiding place?

'ok, so I don't want to have sex, big deal, it's overrated anyway.'

'Liar.'

'Am not!'

'Are too. You can't say it's overrated until you've tried it, in certain circumstances not even then since you might end up with a bloke that knows as much about giving you pleasure as Longbottom knows Potions.'

Giving me pleasure? Hm…getting hot in here…

I clear my throat 'Well, this transfiguration lesson has certainly taken a turn, wouldn't you say?'

'Flustered, Granger? I'm not the one that opened the subject, that I must say I master'

I roll my eyes and gather my things, since it's 15 minutes past my departure time, as I make my way outside of the library, I turn around and giving him a sardonic smile say 'I retract my words, sex isn't over rated, you are, Malfoy'.

a/n: so, this chapter is a little bit longer…so is the time spent looking at a blank sheet of paper trying to write it. Uh, for those of you that write fiction, out there, don't you find it annoying when you know the beginning and you know the ending, but u have absolutely no idea what to do with the in between part? Have any tips and tricks to combat that?

Moving on, hopefully someone is still reading this, and hopefully we have some new recruits (good for you, welcome to the small, but in development family). And, since I'm such a spoilsport I'm gonna tell you that the next chapter is not yet in development, though I have an idea of the next chapter's ending (see the pattern here?), and I along with my colleagues are probably the only people alive on this planet that still have exams…till late july. So… as you can imagine, duty calls. But, since I have the ending to this story, the chances of quitting it are slim to none.

I've written **another short story** about Draco and Hermione that you can read by clicking my name up there, and I'll post a one shot probably at the same time this goes up, if you want to check it out.

*do not own anything related to Harry Potter*

*English is not my first language so I might make mistakes, sorry for them*

and if I keep writing, my author's note is going to be longer than the chapter, so…**knut for your thoughts?**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

You feel the pain

~Chimera~

After that day I took a new interest in Malfoy, hence me looking at him at the moment, as he's, you guessed it, sleeping in Snape's class. Wow, probably the only one that could pull that off.

I don't understand how I could've been so opened to him last night. It felt strangely cathartic, probably that's how girls feel after a hen night.

Hm... you have to admit he is beautiful. His fringe falls over his closed eyes as his lips part murmuring something. Every bone in his face is so well shaped, every inch of skin is smooth and pale and immaculate; his eyelashes are long and dark despite his white blonde hair; his lips rosy and sensual; and his hands… oh, his hands.

SNAP out of it, GRANGER!

I'm sure this is just a side effect of missing him. I mean, it's not like Malfoy is more beautiful than he is. Well… maybe the grey eyes…and the white hair… but that's all, plus, he cares for me, whereas Malfoy hates me with all his might.

Next to him, I can see Pansy looking at him longingly, poor pug faced slut, she really is whipped, isn't she? Look at her, her 90 pounds, 5 foot 6, precious pureblood frame. She even had that stupid nose redone, so now she looked like a model. I hated her. She was perfect, a perfect little shiny doll.

Lets all face it, I envied her. Who wouldn't? I always try to convince myself and others that being smart is above being pretty, or in this case drop dead gorgeous, but in my mind, in the darkest corner of it, I know I'm not actually believing what I am saying. How could I, when I, myself, am attracted to beautiful men? Appearance counts… a lot, I would not delude myself, but I can't be like her, I don't have, neither the body, nor the confidence to be like her. I am simple, like hundreds of other girls out there that buy witch weekly and stare at the front picture of Malfoy, heartthrob of the last what, 5 years?… yeah, I'm just like them, another faceless face in the crowd.

But… I didn't stare at Malfoy…No, not me!

Merlin…I'm staring.

3

I have to figure out what he's doing in that goddamn room.

Maybe I should just knock and ask if I could come in.

Uh, I amuse myself most of the time.

Strangely enough, as I spy on him, from under Harry's invisibility cloak (no, he doesn't know I took it) I can't see Crabbe and Goyle, only two second year Ravenclaws, or some other house. But as I look at the map, Crabbe and Goyle bullets are the only ones on the floor.

So Malfoy is smart enough to brew Polyjuice. Can't say I didn't expect it. Now the only problem is, Polyjuice takes time to brew, so either this has been on the agenda even before coming here, or he had a batch of it lying away somewhere, highly unlikely. So this is something planned to the very detail.

I again think I should tell Harry, this seems dangerous, but my gut tells me to stick to my promise. I'll confront him in 5 days time, when I see him. For now, though, I should probably keep a closer watch on Malfoy while he isn't in that room, maybe I can find out what he's plotting. I can't very well get past dumb and dumber, and then face the devil himself.

3

No luck finding out anything.

I'm seeing Malfoy again tonight, and tomorrow I'm going to see _him_. I can't help but be anxious. I even spent half an hour rummaging through my closet so I could find something nice to wear. I'm still supposed to wear the school uniform, but I though I'd spice it up a bit, throw in a pair of kitten heels and a shorter skirt. Never hurts to try, does it? Actually, after my inspection of Pansy I have decided that maybe I could spare half an hour a day to try and tame my hair and put on a bit of eyeliner. I am after all a seventeen year old, girls these days start using makeup at the age of twelve, ergo, I think I am allowed to use a bit of eyeliner and some mascara.

I glance in a window on my way to see Malfoy. I look a bit pale. I pinch my cheeks, and blood comes flowing into them making them a rosy peach. Then I almost slap myself for caring this much about a STUDY date.

I walk in the library all bossy and determined to see this over and done with so I can go back to my room and have a good nights rest before tomorrow when I am supposed to see the man I truly like.

'Oh, there you are, I was beginning to think you weren't going to come. I even had a coffee so I could be more awake today' he says gesturing to the empty cup.

'What, no sordid remarks?'

'Well, I was going to say something about your hair being a bird's nest, but somehow you're a step ahead of me.'

Was that supposed to be a compliment?

'Guess now's my cue to call you a Mudblood. So,_ Mudblood_, what's on the table today?'

Somehow that didn't sound like an insult, somehow it sounded as if I expected him to insult me, and he felt obliged to do so, just to keep up our routine, and most importantly, somehow, he knew I wouldn't lash out at him, which only comes to prove that our sick and twisted relationship has evolved to something sicker and more twisted than it was before, only for the fact that we now seemed to get along.

I pull out my transfiguration book and the tests that I have for today. He pulls out his book, and we get down to business.

3

'Wonderful work, as always, I shall speak to McGonagall, see if I can get her to let you off the hook'

'I'd appreciate that.' He says still sitting. 'So, who's the guy?'

I get my head out of my magically expanded bag and look at him like a deer caught in the headlights. 'What?'

'Not what, who?'

'What are you talking about?'

'Come on, Granger, the hair, the almost invisible makeup that I am sure you just can't get to a bathroom quickly enough to take it off, because it's bothering you, the fitted shirt, the…'

'It doesn't bother me, I …'

'Please, Granger, don't insult my intelligence, I've been playing nice all night, don't spoil it, you're eye's been twitching for the last hour, you clearly feel uncomfortable wearing makeup. Is it that guy that got into a fight with me?'

'No, of course not, I haven't seen him since, plus, there doesn't have to be a guy. Can't I just try to feel good about myself?'

'By making you feel worse?'

'God, Malfoy, you really know how to burst my bubbles, don't you? All the girls wear makeup, why can't I? Because I'm too nerdy to, or is it because it looks bad on me whatever I do?'

'I didn't say it looked bad.'

'Well then, what's the problem? I don't see you complaining when you see pansy wearing makeup'

'So this is about a guy' he says smirking.

'Noo!'

'Oky, Granger, have it your way. A free piece of advice, though, Pansy looks like crap in the morning, so if you're really gonna go all girly, than know that despite what we want to see before we fuck you, after we fuck you, if we stick around, it'd be lovely to wake up to a beautiful woman sitting next to us.'

I opened my mouth to say something, but I couldn't find the words. This was Malfoy opening up to me for the second time around. I just nodded my head stiffly and then exited the library.

I went to sleep, thinking about Malfoy's words. Basically he was telling me that whatever I do, it's bloody hard to be everything for a man.

3

I woke up this morning feeling hazy. Something was up, my magical aura was just on a roll, making my hair frizzier, like it wasn't bad enough. I spent half an hour trying to tame the stupid thing, but I just couldn't get it to sit right. I finally give up it's still better than on most days, but still not what I wanted it to look like. I don't even have time to put makeup on now.

I fly out the door, and run for the stairs. I'm going to be late.

I arrive at the bathroom, out of breath. I take some time to adjust my breathing and straighten my skirt and shirt. If it weren't for the kitten heels I would have gotten here a lot faster.

So here goes nothing. I enter the bathroom and immediately have a bad feeling. i hear a faint gasping sound and I make my way further in.

As I glance, from behind a stall, I can see a boy perched over a sink, his white blond hair stands out like nothing else, and again, the same sound comes from him. But now I recognize it. It's not a gasp, it's a sob. There is something so terrifying about Malfoy crying, it's something I never though I'd see.

I silently approach him putting a hand on his shoulder. He spins around and grabs me by my arms, painfully digging his nails into them. I wince, but otherwise do not say anything. He's looking at me, with desperate, bloodshot eyes, tears marring his perfect face. So much pain… the same pain. My pain.

And then he kisses me. It's hurried and angry and sloppy, but it's the best kiss of my life, so I let him, because I know how he feels and I would give anything to take the pain away.

I soon find myself on the sink, my legs straddling his lower frame, my hands in his hair, his hands up my shirt. It feels so good, so right so it can't be wrong, can it?

I pull him forward and embrace him 'I'm here' I tell him 'And I'm not going'.

3

As I lay in his arms, still perched on the sink, holding him tightly, I can't help but wonder how it would have been like if we would have had sex in normal circumstances… not that I regret it.

His body's still shaking, maybe with tears, maybe with pants, I'm not sure. I move my hand over his back, soothingly, pecking his neck. I feel him trying to talk so I stop, giving him time.

'They killed her' he rasps out. 'They said I wasn't going fast enough… so they killed her'

I had gathered as much. His mother…the same pain.

He pulls back and looks at me with pleading eyes 'Tell me I can do something to bring her back, tell me there's a book. Tell me she's not gone.'

I feel my heart shatter. I look at him straight in the eyes 'I'm sorry, Draco.'

'No…no…'

I adjust our clothes quickly and grab his hand.

'Let me help you'

'I don't need your help' he snarls.

I feel hurt for a moment but I can understand.

'I know you don't need it, I know you don't want it, but I'm asking. Please let me be there for you' I try to grab his hand again, but he pulls it back.

'Get away from me you filthy Mudblood!'

'I know it hurts! They killed my parents too!' I half yell. 'You can't think straight, so let me take care of you, we have to ensure your safety, they'll come after you now, I can't let that happen'

He slid down a stall door. 'let them find me. They already killed me, Granger' he says lifting his sleeve. 'the moment I got this I knew I was dead'

The Dark Mark was looking at me, if possible even more evil against his pale skin.

' You're not a death eater' I said firmly.

'When you use that tone of voice, who's not to believe you, Granger' he mocked 'But how do you explain the tattoo then?'

'You're not! You are a student, you are a boy, but you are not a Death Eater. You're Draco. Now get up. We're going to see Dumbledore.'

He looked at me for what seemed like hours before he finally stood. I walked by him the entire way to Dumbledore's office, and then started reciting candy names for the next hour, but now we're finally here, in Dumbledore's office, where nothing could harm us, because we have Dumbledore.

a/n: ah, there we go, another one. Next one will be up at the end of July, until then either read my other stories, or check my favourite authors, I love their works, and god bless them for being better updaters than me. *chuckles*. Now then, **any thoughts?**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

My Mistake

~Chimera~

a/n: ta-da. This is my first multichapter completed story ever, so don't mind me while I do a happy dance. I know you probably wanted a longer story, with longer chapters, but I'm just getting the hang of it. I have ideas, but I don't know how to fill them up properly. But practice makes perfect. Thank you to everyone that has reviewed thus far and everyone that will review, I really appreciate your opinions.

**a/n: (20/07/2011) no, it's not an update, the story is complete. However, I just received a wonderful review (that's yours Corinne), and since I can't answer her (because the review was anonymous) I really wanted to somehow respond to her message. ****So, though it's not much, I want to dedicate this final chapter to all my reviewers thus far, because they deserve it.**

**Corinne – I think your review was a lot more throat constricting than most of my chapters. Thank you so much. ****like a trip to Hogwarts**

***if you do leave anonymous reviews, I am sorry, but I won't be able to update my story every time to respond to them, but know that I read them and I really appreciate you taking the time to give your opinion in regards to my work. **

Warning/reminder: English is not my first language, so you might encounter mistakes.

Draco's POV

I got home from a tiring day at work. Of course Potter and his superman complex had to go in without waiting for me, get hurt and leave the rest to me e.i catch the bad guys _and_ apparate him to Mungo's. If it weren't for his friend I would have probably left him there. Stupid idiot. But since his best friend is a witch that not only saved my life, but also makes me breakfast every morning, I couldn't very well leave him there.

I look at the wedding band on my finger and smile.

We were out on a coffee break when I proposed. One moment she's eating her coconut ice cream like a little girl, smiling at me and excitedly putting me up to date with her patients at St Mungo's, and then a man passes by us with an elf humbly following. She gets up and starts lecturing the guy for hours on end, relentless in her pursuit of the elf's freedom.

I decided not to interfere, but upon seeing her go from being my innocent Hermione, to a fully grown, emancipated (and scary) woman, I realized that she was it: the rest of my life.

'Can you believe the nerve of that guy, calling the…'

'Marry me'

'And I just couldn…what?'

I pulled her to me and looked up into her eyes. 'I love you. I'll always love you. Marry me'

And just like that she said yes, no fancy Malfoy heirloom, no pre-planned trip, just two people that knew the full extent of their life.

Sometimes I even ask myself what she was thinking when saying yes. I am hardly the best husband and I was an even worse boyfriend, not to mention that our relationship evolved from being enemies, before the war, to being allies during it. I looked her up after the war, not so difficult a feat seeing as she was always in the paper. I asked her to go out with me as a thank you gesture for helping me during the war, when my mother died. Not being my usual idiotic self, I was able to realize what a fantastic person she was: smart, compassionate, hard worker, and beautiful in her very own way.

She had clearly been attracted to me at least physically for some time, and she let slip that she thought I was smart, but other than that it took some time for her to warm up to me. I always felt like something was drawing her back, away from me. After one year of dating, I finally found out what the problem was.

We moved in together eleven months from our first date. Giving yet another story for the newspapers to put on their front page. Apparently two war heroes were bound to end up there.

One month after moving in together, I did what no boyfriend should ever do. I mistakenly encountered her diary, and stupidly gave all my best to open it, curiosity licking at my wand.

And I found it, the reason she still held back. Right there, in a couple of pages, my history stood. I read about the mysterious stranger that plagued her thoughts everyday, and I understood that since that story had no finality she just couldn't let go, she couldn't give herself to me whole. I got incredibly mad about that. I didn't tell her what I had done, but I started looking for fights everywhere. We ended up splitting for a couple of weeks, in which I did my research, combining what I remember, with what I had read in her journal. We got back together eventually, and after another week I managed to put things together and I finally found my answer.

I married her soon after that.

There isn't a day that I am not happy to come home to the beautiful woman that is my wife. But there are days, like today, when I see her doing this exact thing: looking out the window deep in thought. I know what she's thinking. I know who she's thinking about.

I know she loves me, but I also know that at times she loves **him** more.

And as I touch the time turner underneath my shirt I look at her again, thinking I should tell her, but I don't because I don't deserve all of her, because after all, it was (or would have been) my mistake that I had to fix. I deserve to be jealous of myself…


End file.
